Entrepreneur Personal Development

5 Tips For Telling Powerful Stories That Influence

If a story is not about the hearer he [or she] will not listen . . . A great lasting story is about everyone or it will not last. The strange and foreign is not interesting-only the deeply personal and familiar. ― John Steinbeck

Storytelling has likely been around since the beginning of time. The first cave paintings from 27,000 thousand years ago are seen as an early form of storytelling. People have been fascinated by stories. While sitting around a fire, stories were the first and only way to share information, dreams, to entertain, inspire and connect with others long before humans had any other forms of communication. Effective communication has always been about storytelling and today, the best communicators are also good at it.

     Not only is it commonly accepted that good storytelling beats other forms of communication hands down, there is scientific evidence that backs this up. When we receive information from a power point presentation, the language part of our brain that decodes words into meaning becomes activated. However, when we listen to a story, a lot more happens. Not only does the language processing part of our brain become activated, but other parts of our brain begin to process the experience of the story for ourselves. For example, descriptions for foods would activate our sensory cortex. In other words, hearing a story puts much more of our brain to work than simply listening to a presentation. Not only can we stimulate various areas of the brain, but if the listener relates to a story, their brains can become synchronized with the storyteller.  Emotions that the storyteller is experiencing can be shared with the listener.

Knowing the influence that telling a good story can hold, an effective leader can use storytelling to not only share information but connect with the people around him.  Here are some things to keep in mind.


Less is more; this is a basic rule of good storytelling. Avoid the complex, detailed, as well as the use of adjectives and complicated nouns. Using simple language is the best way to activate regions of the brain that help us relate to the events in a story.  Remember that you are not trying to impress, but to share an experience.


To be effective, the audience must be able to relate to the story. Talking about an experience on a yacht would not be a good way for the CE0 of an organization to connect with front-line workers.  This would likely have the opposite effect and distance his audience from him or her. Telling a heartfelt story about going fishing with a family member or a grandchild would be much more effective as this would be something many in the audience could identify with.


Talking too much about ourselves directly can be viewed by others as being self-serving and turn them off. Skillful storytellers can weave information about themselves, they want the audience to know, without appearing to be pretentious. Past stories of struggles, failures and overcoming barriers the storyteller has experienced are excellent sources that help the teller connect with the audience as everyone has experienced these in life. This will compel the storyteller to appear more human, more like one of the audience.


Audiences love speakers who are able to laugh at themselves. Let yourself be vulnerable.  Everyone has done something downright embarrassing and silly.  Sharing these moments will resonate strongly with the audience.


I have attended numerous seminars from an individual that I have grown to admire and respect. At some point in the workshop he always shares the story about how his brother and he almost lost their company. At a certain point he tears up as he shares this experience. You can feel the connection with the audience. Even though I have heard the story a number of times, I know he is sincere when he is sharing this and my respect for him increases. If you have strong emotions that come up when telling a story, don’t try to suppress them. Of course, you would need to manage your feelings as an uncontrolled display of crying or laughing would not create the desired result. However, showing some emotion increases trust and forms a bond between the speaker and the audience.

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About the author

Harvey Deutschendorf

Harvey Deutschendorf

Harvey Deutschendorf is an emotional intelligence expert, internationally published author and speaker. Take The EI Quiz: theotherkindofsmart.com. Read The Book:THE OTHER KIND OF SMART, Simple Ways to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence for Greater Personal Effectiveness and Success has been published in 4 languages. You can follow him on Twitter @theeiguy.