Authentic Lifestyle Personal Development

3 Common Habits Keeping Your Life In A Holding Pattern

Maria Flynn
Written by Maria Flynn

Unless you’re intentionally living and creating a purpose-aligned life, then it’s the unintentional habits that take over (and so do the patterns that keep your life on hold).

If you just can’t break free, then it may be that your habits are creating energy boulders keeping your desires in place and the Universe at bay from delivering what you want.

Definition: Energy Boulder [noun]: A blockage in your energetic path leading to and from the universal life force, which can hold you back in all areas of your life.

Certainly, life has its natural ebb and flow, but leaning entirely into flow without intentional influence from you (as the creator), then life will go slow leaning more into a reactive lifestyle versus an abundant lifestyle.

Definition:  Abundant Lifestyle [verb]: Creating and living a meaningful and purpose-aligned life where how you choose to live magnifies your energy to attract more of the life you want (in all areas of life harmoniously).

Here are 3 common habits that keep your life “On Hold”:

1. Putting it on other people and things.

Do you daydream “starting over” in a new town, state, or country?  Do you imagine yourself in a new job or new career? Do you think if you had that “right” partner, your love life would be positively different?  And… if you’ve had the courage to move, or start a new job, or leave and start a new relationship…do you suddenly find yourself frustrated all over again?

When life feels frustrating…ESPECIALLY if you felt you took the risk and all you got were lackluster results, then a new perspective is in order.  Your effort and energy is action investing on outside resources you think will be fulfilling, but in truth, it’s not (and will never be).

Your outer world is a reflection of your inner world.  ~T. Harv Eker

Looking (and acting) outside of yourself for solutions is doomed to failure. No exceptions.  In fact, the action of going outside of self and leaning on other people and resources for joy keeps you small.  Furthermore, the action in doing so expands the energy of lackluster results and therefore expands the energy boulder preventing you from growing and experiencing an abundant lifestyle.

Conversely, the attitude and action of taking full responsibility for your life taps into your power to CREATE (ideas, solutions, and so much more).  The more you lean into what YOU can do (inner work that includes empowering your mind and energy), the more your own confidence and courage emerge helping you transform and create an abundant lifestyle (that includes more joy in your life and your relationships).

2. Suppressing negative feelings.

Are you under the impression that anger, guilt, or sadness are “negative” feelings?  Do you do all you can to avoid and replace those feeling for better feeling ones?

Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.” ~Sigmund Freud

Suppressing negative emotions without a doubt will result in a build-up of toxic energy and emotions infecting the mind, body, and spirit.  Without proper (healthy) exploration and release, the build-up of toxicity will explode by way of illness or overly harsh reactions toward the people you love.

Replacing “negative” emotions with better feelings ones is not positive nor healthy.  In fact, you’re suppressing your negative emotions, and so you are also “housing” or “storing” your emotions.  Doing this actually exacerbates depression, illness, and more.

When you feel negative emotions arise, don’t deny them, instead bring awareness to it.  Learn from them and ask yourself what is it that you’re afraid of?  What is it about your experience that you can identify as familiar to other past issues?  Give yourself a safe place to “feel it” so that you can heal it.  By identifiying how the emotion and experience resonate with you overall, you can bring new perspective to it by shifting from avoidance to action plan moving forward—making YOU fully responsible as to how you choose to move forward (and less time and energy wasted suppressing it).

Remember, everything in your life is happening FOR you and not TO you.  When you get this, you spend little time avoiding the negative feelings and instead appreciate what you’ve learned and how you can grow.

3. Sharing your expected self.

Is who you are alone the same person you are with others?  Do you speak and live your truth?  Do you fear looking stupid in front of others?

Don’t trade your authenticity for the approval of others. ~Unknown

If you’re focusing your time and energy to make yourself what you think others expect of you, you remove the very thing that makes you most attractive—YOU.  Like suppressing negative emotions, when you suppress your true self, you suppress your talents, your inner wisdom, your unique “quirkiness” that makes you attractive.

Habits that lean away from living your authentic self, ignites the habit of leaving yourself last.  That means putting everyone and everything else before you, leaving little or no time for you and exploring what makes you, you.

The self-talk telling yourself that you’re “helping others” may temporarily feel good, but ostensibly keeps your life on hold.  You may be great at supporting others advancement in life, but waiting on “someday” for your day to come, won’t.

Do any of the 3 habits resonate with you and your life?

Consider the awareness you received from this article a VERY GOOD THING.  Awareness is the necessary (can-not-be-skipped) first step to your own transformation.  It’s true!  

Releasing these habits begins by choosing differently and exploring more your life more.  Indeed, if you want different in your life you’re going to have to DO different.

I’m a HUGE supporter of communities, personal development programs focused on your growth and healing as some of the most transformational environments.  However, it’s only up to you to place yourself in them.

Don’t be fooled, a lifetime of habits don’t go away overnight…

It’s your commitment to creating and living an abundant lifestyle by placing yourself in the environments that will prompt you to stay the course and grow even beyond your own expectations is a decision only you can direct and manage.  To be sure, life left unchecked, is a life for the mediocre mind.  Leaving life unchecked unintentionally creates and builds energy boulders in your life keeping areas of your life on hold.  Don’t stop at this article, I encourage you to keep GOing and keep GROWing.

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About the author

Maria Flynn

Maria Flynn

Maria Flynn is the founder of One Wise Life as well as writer, coach, and creator of Your Energy Makeover, Spirituality For The Stubborn Soul Membership, and ABUNDANCE Bootcamp 3-Week Intensive. Maria has transformed her own life using the same methods she teaches her students to overcome and heal from abuse, obesity, and depression.

Maria has impacted the lives of millions through her online programs and social media presence. Maria has created a space for others to find self-love, self-discovery, self-improvement, and a renewed trust in their own intuition that answers the inner ache for those wanting more meaning and fulfillment in life.

Maria's purpose is to educate individuals to the reality that everyone (no exceptions) is a Sacred Thumbprint of the Universe (an extension and expression of the Universe) and therefore have an innate ability to work in HARMONYwith the Universe by integrating their own Spiritual Force supporting the creation of joyful, successful, meaningful, and ABUNDANT lifestyles. Maria's proven that her real and practical approach and systems work with clients around the world who've experienced massive breakthroughs.